What I have always wanted to ask…

This is a new category based on an idea from Marta. A question will be posted asking for input and counsel regarding a specific challenge. Please use the comment section for your response.

Q2: My wife is not interested in spiritual matters and she has a dense painbody. Since I have started to practice presence, things have become worse.

Your words of wisdom will be appreciated.

If you have a question, please feel free to email it to me and I will post it accordingly.

Previous questions can be found here

About Michaela

I am a wanderer and a wonderer, like you are. I love our journey and to walk in the company of friends – to learn, experience, share, laugh, cry and above all I simply love this marvelous, magical, mysterious life. I have no plan (cannot believe I am saying this) and my only intention is to be truthful to myself and others.
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4 Responses to What I have always wanted to ask…

  1. Michael says:

    I would speculate your wife’s attitude has not really changed. What has changed is you being more aware of it. With Presence comes clarity. I would further speculate that her aversion to things spiritual heightens her awareness of what Eckhart refers to as the pain body. Remember the symbolism in the Exorcist of the sprinkling of holy water on the person possessed? As you Awaken the ego self of your wife is fearful and pained.

    With time and patience her resistance will lessen. Rid yourself of words like worse. Such words are like traps.

  2. Michaela says:

    When one changes, the other one changes as well. This may be subtle at first, but as consciousness moves towards unconsciousness, old structures are breaking open. This can be very unsettling for anybody involved.

    Transparency is key. If it is possible to speak about the changes that you feel inside of you, communicate that. Become aware and let go of any expectation you may have about yourself, the others and your own awakening. Allow Life to rebalance everything, because even if this leads to a perceived deterioration of the situation, it is just the process of un-truth coming to the light.

  3. Well, I feel compelled to share a little story; hope this helps.

    This week my refrigerator stopped working, and the repairman who came to visit turned out to be one of the best spiritual teachers I’ve run across in quite a while. He was a 60 year old gentleman with kind blue eyes, thick white hair and a gentle manner. Completely comfortable with long silent spaces during our time together, couched within interesting conversation surrounding the mechanics of what makes a refrigerator break and what things one might do to repair it, he asked if I’d let our Golden Retriever Noah out of the kennel while we waited to see if the frig was responding to his repairs. I asked if he had a pet at home. Here’s where the spiritual teaching began. He said when he was 14, his dad brought home a raccoon he had received from a client who was getting a divorce (his dad was a domestic relations attorney). Raccoons can be quite vicious, but the couple bound for divorce court had kept this female raccoon as a pet for a couple of years with some alleged success. My repairman, being an animal lover, volunteered to care for the raccoon after his mom was bitten while trying to feed her. The animal retreated into a hollowed out log they had placed in the cage and would not come out for anyone or anything for days on end. They began to worry she would die of dehydration, but this repairman said he would persistently come home from school and just stand next to the cage and be silently present, giving space to the raccoon to just be … whatever she happened to feel like doing or not doing at the time. Eventually she did come out, allowing him to feed her and going on over time to become a treasured pet. He said the key was patience and acceptance. Interestingly, she continued to be dangerous around other members of the family. What a poignant story about the healing power of presence; even a wild animal can respond to patience and openness! Marvelous that life provides spiritual teachers in the most unexpected ways, isn’t it? Does your wife enjoy nature or art, music, or poetry? There are many spiritual experiences of a more experiential nature she may be more receptive to. I do wonder if once she senses you have let go of your need for her to embrace spirituality in the form that you do, not unlike that wild raccoon, her response to your patience and acceptance just may surprise you. Best wishes to you both… SOL.

  4. Michaela says:

    Patience and acceptance. Thats pretty good practice, I’d say…

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