Holy Anger


And one day I saw how we are all connected and working together.

For a while I have been able to clearly differentiate when someone spoke or acted from higher consciousness as opposed to their reactive patterns of the conditioned mind.  It was maddening, because it was like getting two sets of information at the same time.

On one hand I would evaluate a situation from an egoic position, watching my own reactive patterns and my tendencies to defend my interests. But on the other hand I more and more realised the bigger picture behind it and why people do what they do. Everything that happens is a playing together on several levels and just to focus on what is going on in the world of form, is missing the point completely.

For me it was the end of getting mad at anyone.  But I could also see why some people in a process of awakening can get into the habit of taking positions – either the relative side playing out their egoic patterns of resistance and control, or moving to the absolute position to hide and avoid taking action.

I could clearly see how we are beautiful, innocent beings – but at the same time acting like jerks on the level of form.  For a while this went on in parallel, as opposed to the usual moving in and out of the different states of consciousness. I could see how spiritual bypassing happens, if we are  seeing both sides, but believe we have to fixate on one.

Then something happened that was upsetting. Someone I trusted betrayed our friendship. I felt manipulated, deceived and taken advantage of. It was a situation that clearly asked for me to defend myself, take action and protect my own interest. But suddenly it clicked and it was revealed:

The conscious is the unconscious and the unconscious is the conscious.

I could see how we all are co-operating with each other at all times for the sole purpose of saving each other. We have sacred contracts, we serve each other and we all are acting from a level of consciousness and compassion at all times. This is why everything that happens is what is supposed to happen – which does not mean it could not be wrong.

Only on the level of form we have a choice. And this choice can be clouded by egoic conditioning or driven by higher consciousness. The more we understand how our reactive patterns are working, the more we let go of them – the more we act from our true nature.

What happened to me was a betrayal of trust – but it was also a loud and clear invitation to serve myself,  my friend and everyone involved in the light of the occasion. It became perfectly clear how to respond by listening to the true calling behind what has happened on the gross level of form.

My conditioned reactions would have been to defend and protect myself. The action that unfolded in this case was surprising to me and led to an exchange that revealed a lot about my own patterns and attempts to manipulate and control. It led to the insight that I was called to play my part and if I refused to do it, I would let the others down.

And I found out the beauty of getting mad, without getting mad at someone. It is a rush of energy, enabling and motivating action to move from a position of darkness to light.  In German we have an expression “holy anger”. This is how it felt like – holy anger, an energy that is not directed to manipulate or control – but to serve.

Holy anger serves Truth, but not the truth of the righteous.

About Michaela

I am a wanderer and a wonderer, like you are. I love our journey and to walk in the company of friends – to learn, experience, share, laugh, cry and above all I simply love this marvelous, magical, mysterious life. I have no plan (cannot believe I am saying this) and my only intention is to be truthful to myself and others.
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3 Responses to Holy Anger

  1. fatima says:

    Marille that is an awesome realization.

    In Islam, although anger, ghazab (sp) is considered a destructive sin, at the same time it contains the transformative energy of fire (emotion). That transformation can only happen when anger is resisted. That is how it is spoken of in the context of my experience. We usually describe that reality differently here.

    In Islam also, there is clearly a place even an exhortation to resist and correct perceived wrongs in life. As a human-beings it is spoken of as an obligation. Holy anger, “not my will God but Yours be done”. True rightous anger can manifest only through an ‘observed’ ego, one whose slippery tricks are recognized ‘known’ as they arise.

    Need I say that in this upside down egoic world these realities have all but been completely usurped? Yet they are realities that be intuited by many although they manifest, for many of us, as reactions, opinions, judgement etc. Thank you Ekhart Tolle for the clarity your teaching brings.

    Another conversation comes to mind. What you seem to be describing here falls into the realm of the spiritualized ego, one that is free of much of the grossest egoic illusions, one that is more rooted in presence. The Prodigal Son…..context is important…. in the biblical passages just before the allegory appears….Who are the Pharisees in the presence Jesus with his message of “the Christ” in you? and……Who are we? Do we know for sure that in that context we would not act as they? That is spiritual pride Ujub, one of the qualities of Satan. In the allegory that follows, the brother is an example of simple egoic illusion, jealousy, self righteousness, etc. In other words he is us…..too. The prodigal son is us too.

    Does it matter? These distinctions? Not really. Just something to ponder.

    Thank you for sharing this insight with us. Bye the way, betraying a trust is grievous in Islam, worse than ghazab, egoic anger. A muslim, a true human-being as we are meant to be, has an obligation to respond appropriately. It appears that that is what you experienced here.

    May we all cling to experiencing the meaning of “On the spiritual path the end is the same as the beginning.” Thank you Ekhart Tolle for the teaching you bring.

  2. Angelika says:

    To me anger is an important sensation.
    It is a strong pointer to mostly unconscious patterns.
    On the surface it shows a big “NO” to what is,
    and deep within it contains a strong “YES”.

    In self – inquiry we can see and feel it all.

    PS: I prefer to neither label this emotion nor judge it.

  3. Raymond Lees says:

    Yes, thankyou Michaela, i have struggled these past few years living with teenagers and not knowing when to express and when to watch

    There have been times when anger was just impatience and intolerance and other times when the anger was “holy” and the result was a deepening of relationship and both parties in the exchange.

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